My three angels
"I realised my mental illness was not because of others doing wrong to me, but because of my own perception of others and myself" ~ University scholar
A story about love, duty, empathy and realisation
"In India and many other Asian countries the culture is different, in many respects, from that in New Zealand. One example that may seem strange to Kiwis is that, in New Zealand the individual takes precedence over the group, but in India it is the other way round: family and society takes precedence over the individual.
Unfortunately, however, although I was living in India, I was more motivated and inspired by individualism. I would consider what I liked and what I wanted, rather than sacrificing my own thoughts, ideals, desires or expectations for the sake of society alone.
I continued my pursuits and completed many university degrees, including engineering, management, law and homoeopathy.
During my management studies, I started loving a girl who was from a different caste and social background. I grew up believing my parents loved me unconditionally and that they would understand me and accept my dreams and aspirations. Therefore, one day I gathered the courage to share the news of my love with my parents. Unfortunately, my family started to ‘emotionally blackmail' me.
They told me they would die if I did not live up to their expectations and marry a girl from our community and caste."
Torn between two loves
"At this point, the world started getting darker for me; on one side was my love and devotion for my parents and on the other was my love for my girlfriend and my dreams. Ultimately, my parents did change their point of view, but by then it was too late. My girlfriend had gone and I was in a mental institution.
I do not exactly remember when and where my recovery started. I don't know if medical treatment helped me or not. But when I join the broken links still floating in my memory, I think my recovery was possibly due to three angels in my life:
A doctor - as a professional, she studied my case. In her words: "when I studied this man's case, I was amazed by so many university degrees and yet he had a mental illness. I started visiting him, and perhaps my empathy and unconditional acceptance helped his recovery". Today, this doctor is my wife.
A friend - he talked to this doctor and suggested that I attend a self-empowerment workshop that he had influenced him. It was revolutionary for me! Most doctors and social gurus had preached the same learning but with little or no effect. The experience of this workshop, however, affected me deep in my soul. I realised my mental illness was not because of others doing wrong to me, but because of my own perception of others and myself. Later I adopted these workshops into my own career.
Mind and Body Consultants Ltd - this organisation has reinforced my self-empowerment. Its peer support service has accelerated my recovery process; it's a two-way process whereby in helping other people in their recovery, we help ourselves by reinforcing our recovery."
