Searching for moments of happiness

"Life is about finding happy moments amid the ups and downs. Happy moments do not just come to us, we need to learn how to find them."

A story about the enormous benefits of becoming part of a peer support group

"Life is full of ups and downs and, while we sometimes have tough times, it's the moments of happiness that remain with us.

One of my unhappiest times was when I experienced mental illness and was admitted to hospital. I still remember the feeling of being left all alone, feeling helpless, staring at the ceiling and counting every minute.

The repetitive regime of having to take medicine and have injections, and the unchanging monotony of daily meal times made me feel like a machine with no variety or ability to change the hospital protocols.

Certainly my children came to visit, but our conversations were difficult. I suppose part of it may have been the generation gap but our communication was always boring and focused on questions around how I was feeling, or if there was anything I needed. It became like an over-rehearsed movie dialogue. I wanted to talk about my feelings, but just couldn't establish a connection between us. Time passed slowly and, while the world outside was quiet, inside, I was longing to be heard.

All this changed when my friends, who had also experienced mental illness, came to visit me. My heart filled with sunshine because I had people to talk with who shared my experience, joys and sorrows, and understood my journey to recovery. Sometimes they even made fun of me but it was done with such warmth and humour that it made it possible for us all to have a good laugh.

For me, meeting these people was one of my happiest moments. We had met at an organisation that provided professional and peer support for people with experience of mental illness. This organisation has become my home. Let me give you a few examples of how it has helped us and why we love it so much.

Julia's mother suffers from high blood pressure and even though her age and medical condition means that just walking is hard for her, she always looks after us during our meetings by making cups of tea, washing the dishes and helping with the cleaning.

Nicky held a grudge against her homeland because of the way she had been treated there, but after joining our organisation, she was able to let go of those feelings of animosity. She can now use a computer and has overcome her fear and anxiety to become our chairperson.

As for Mere, she worries about her son, especially if she feels he is taking too much time off work, but she still finds time to contribute to the organisation.

This home brought joy, hope, courage and love to our lives. Spending time with my beloved friends makes me happy. When I am having difficulties talking to my daughter, I talk to them instead, knowing that we can talk about anything. Here we can talk to each other about our problems and it has helped many of us recover from our mental health problems.

Another member, Cathy, couldn't sleep for days. Even sleeping pills made no difference. But once she was here with us she felt joyful and cared for and this helped her recover from her sleep deprivation.

My friend, May, contacted me and told me that joining the organisation had helped her leave the darkness behind and find a way to look after herself. Another friend, Jill, has become part of our family and Charlie, Ron and Kenny, who used to be very quiet, are now chatty and cheerful as well.

Is it true that this organisation is able to perform miracles?

My answer is, certainly. The peer support group has created a safe and happy space for us to learn about ourselves and to make new friends. From learning Tai Chi and studying WRAP (wellness recovery action plan) to learning art, all of these opportunities have made us feel part of a big family.

Life is about finding happy moments amid the ups and downs. Happy moments do not just come to us, we need to learn how to find them. If you would like to recover from your broken heart, come and join our peer support group."